From the course: Developing Your Emotional Intelligence

Managing your mindset

From the course: Developing Your Emotional Intelligence

Managing your mindset

- Right now you are probably listening to me talk. You may also have other things going on around you, emails popping up, people chatting, the television somewhere in the background, or a call going on somewhere near you. You'll also be processing information that relates to your body. You could be hot or cold, walking or sitting still, comfortable or not. You could also have a hundred thoughts going around in your head. The point is your brain is processing all of that information at once. It may not seem like a lot as you are used to being able to do this unconsciously but your brain is working hard. So we rely on cognitive shortcuts, which help us to focus on the important information and make quick decisions. This protects us from feeling overwhelmed and from finding even the most simple of decisions, a crippling challenge, but sometimes, our automatic information processing gets it wrong or it gets a bit lazy. This means we might experience some of the same negative emotional triggers time and time again. Triggers are events or things that happen that cause you to feel and think in a way that isn't helpful, in a way that isn't going to achieve the best outcome from a situation. Emotional triggers cause you to interpret the situation around you in a negative way, resulting in an emotional response and then a behavioral response that isn't helpful to you, all of which can happen at the speed of light. Triggers could include a specific situation like being late or presenting to large groups or it could be to do with a specific person. You might feel inadequate with a colleague or when you think of a specific family member it might make you angry. Now, it's time to pause and reflect or jot down some notes, consider challenges that you've faced over the last six months. Are there emotions that you've experienced, thoughts that you've had about the situation that have shown up again and again, you are looking for themes here and you are being a detective, analyzing your past evidence. Now take it a step further. Are there ways your emotions or thinking patterns hijack the way that you respond to situations? In a coaching capacity, when we analyze responses, we often find the same triggers show up again and again. It might be that you get angry or you retreat into yourself or you become defiant or stressed. Whatever it is for you, the chances are you know that your response won't lead to the best outcome for you. Building awareness about events that are triggers will help you to build your self-awareness.

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