はてなキーワード: Mission Impossibleとは
Let’s get one fucking thing straight: WWDC is supposed to be *for developers*。
You know, the people who actually build shit。Who dig into SDKs, APIs, system frameworks。
Who care about real updates like “What the hell is the new SwiftUI lifecycle doing?”
or “Can I finally use fucking private entitlements without jumping through flaming hoops?”
So why the hell does Apple keep opening its most important developer event of the year
with Craig Federighi doing goddamn *skydiving*? Or *parkour*? Or some *Fast & Furious parody*
with an F1 helmet and sunglasses? What the actual fuck is going on?
This isn’t Saturday Night Live。This is supposed to be a showcase of what we’re all supposed
to build our future on。Vision。Platform direction。Architecture。
Instead, we get Craig zooming through corridors in slow-mo like he’s auditioning for
Mission Impossible 9: MacBook Drift。
And it’s not even funny anymore。Maybe the first time it was *kind of* charming。
A little wink at the audience。でも now? It’s just fucking cringe。
Wasted time。Wasted bandwidth。A glossy, over-produced middle finger to every developer
watching, notebook in hand, waiting for the actual meat。
Do you sit there thinking, *“Wow, this is such a great use of my time!”*
“CUT THE SHIT, CRAIG. SHOW ME THE FUCKING TOOLS.”
We’re being sold a fantasy — not a platform vision。
What should be an opportunity to say,
“Here’s how Apple wants developers to think in the next 5 years,”
becomes a shallow PR reel of stunts, shots, and skits。
Developers want **guidance**, not gimmicks。**Vision**, not vanity。
Instead of 3 minutes of Craig pretending he’s Neo in a hallway full of Mac Studios,
how about showing us the **real** architectural shifts in Swift,
or a **deep dive** into low-level memory optimizations in macOS?
How about finally explaining wtf is happening with `SwiftData`?
Or *anything* that makes us better builders?
We could have had 20 more seconds of **clarity**, not costume。
WWDC is Apple’s time to inspire, to lead, to fucking **guide** the ecosystem。
But lately?
It feels more like we’re watching the Craig Federighi Variety Hour。
And I didn’t fucking subscribe to that。
----
Let’s get one f***ing thing straight: WWDC is supposed to be *for developers*.
You know, the people who actually build shit. Who dig into SDKs, APIs, system frameworks.
Who care about real updates like “What the hell is the new SwiftUI lifecycle doing?”
or “Can I finally use fucking private entitlements without jumping through flaming hoops?”
So why the hell does Apple keep opening its most important developer event of the year
with Craig Federighi doing goddamn *skydiving*? Or *parkour*? Or some *Fast & Furious parody*
with an F1 helmet and sunglasses? What the actual f*** is going on?
This isn’t Saturday Night Live. This is supposed to be a showcase of what we’re all supposed
to build our future on. Vision. Platform direction. Architecture.
Instead, we get Craig zooming through corridors in slow-mo like he’s auditioning for
Mission Impossible 9: MacBook Drift.
And it’s not even funny anymore. Maybe the first time it was *kind of* charming.
A little wink at the audience. But now? It’s just fucking cringe.
Wasted time. Wasted bandwidth. A glossy, over-produced middle finger to every developer
watching, notebook in hand, waiting for the actual meat.
Do you sit there thinking, *“Wow, this is such a great use of my time!”*
> “CUT THE SHIT, CRAIG. SHOW ME THE FUCKING TOOLS.”
We’re being sold a fantasy — not a platform vision.
What should be an opportunity to say,
“Here’s how Apple wants developers to think in the next 5 years,”
becomes a shallow PR reel of stunts, shots, and skits.
Developers want **guidance**, not gimmicks. **Vision**, not vanity.
Instead of 3 minutes of Craig pretending he’s Neo in a hallway full of Mac Studios,
how about showing us the **real** architectural shifts in Swift,
or a **deep dive** into low-level memory optimizations in macOS?
How about finally explaining wtf is happening with `SwiftData`?
Or *anything* that makes us better builders?
We could have had 20 more seconds of **clarity**, not costume.
WWDC is Apple’s time to inspire, to lead, to fucking **guide** the ecosystem.
But lately?
It feels more like we’re watching the Craig Federighi Variety Hour.
And I didn’t f***ing subscribe to that.
----
その昔、映画 Mission Impossible を見てたら。「ミッション中断！」の指令が「Abort!」だったよ。MS-DOSでフロッピーディスク使ってるのかと思ったよw
https://headlines.yahoo.co.jp/article?a=20190119-00260918-toyo-soci
時代劇といえば、英語版ウィキペディアにもJidaigekiという項目が立っている。
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jidaigeki
時代劇の復活はなるのか？！
https://books.rakuten.co.jp/rb/9269969/
昭和６４年、江戸の春。日本の起爆装置を仕込んだ水戸光圀の印篭が行方不明になってさあ大変！江戸城中枢水爆スーパーバイズ・システムのコンピュータとリンクするこの印篭には、日本中の城の水爆を起爆する力がある。銭形平次、伝七等の必死の捜索にもかかわらず、印篭の行方は杳として知れない。じゃじゃ馬娘美琴姫の活躍はいかに？第１回小説新潮新人賞に輝く表題作ほか３編。
追記。
タイプミスだったので、気づいたときにすぐに修正したのですが。遅かったですね。
恥ずかしい限りです。
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タイトルを直した時、ブックマークもトラックバックもゼロだ、間に合ったと思ったのだけど、間に合っていなかった。
気のせいだったのでしょうか。
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超高速参勤交代は私も見ましたよ。少人数で村を通った時の誤魔化し方が面白かったです。
英語版のウィキペディアではSamurai Hustleになっています。
でも、MISSION IMPOSSIBLE SAMURAIみたいな名前で昔は立っていた気がする。
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