How can you use contrast to boost your self-confidence when speaking?
Contrast is a powerful technique to make your speech more engaging, memorable, and persuasive. It involves highlighting the differences between two or more ideas, situations, or outcomes, to emphasize a point or create a desired emotion. But contrast can also help you boost your self-confidence when speaking, by making you more aware of your strengths, goals, and audience. Here are some ways you can use contrast to improve your confidence and your speech.
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Rob Clark, Jr., CCEP, CIA, CBM, CVPChief Audit & Compliance Officer at Howard University | Speaker / MC | Audit, Compliance, Risk, Cybersecurity authority
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Chukwuemeka David♟️Academic Coach♟️School Consultant ♟️Global Keynote Speaker. On a mission to help schools thrive and groom students for…
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Shubhra Chaturvedi3× ON CNBC AWAZ AS A PANELIST.Certified Corporate and Soft Skills Trainer with 12+ years of being a Communication and…
One of the most common sources of low self-confidence is comparing yourself to others, especially to speakers who seem more skilled, experienced, or successful than you. This can make you feel inadequate, nervous, or discouraged. Instead of focusing on what others have or do, compare yourself to yourself. Think of how much you have learned, improved, or achieved since you started speaking, or since your last speech. Celebrate your progress and strengths, and acknowledge your areas of improvement. Use contrast to motivate yourself, not to criticize yourself.
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Embracing contrast can be a powerful tool to boost self-confidence in public speaking. Start by acknowledging your past challenges or doubts and contrasting them with your current strengths and achievements. Embrace the contrast between your authentic self and any perceived ideal version, realizing that your uniqueness is your strength. By recognizing these differences, you not only build confidence but also establish a genuine connection with your audience. Embrace the contrast, embrace your authenticity, and let your self-assuredness shine through in every speech.
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How many times have you heard a speaker start off, apologetically, saying, "I'm not a public speaker"? Have you wanted to just get up a leave right then? Please don't do that. If you are called to speak on an issue, accept that you have been recognized as being knowledgeable about the subject with something worth sharing with others. Go into your presentation knowing that you are THE world's foremost expert on what YOU are going to say! Nobody on the planet will be able to present YOUR information the way that you will. Of course, it is prudent to work on developing your presentation skills and getting feedback. Getting involved in a local Toastmasters Club is highly recommended. (You can thank me later!)
Another common source of low self-confidence is imagining the worst-case scenarios, such as forgetting your words, boring your audience, or facing hostile questions. These fears can make you anxious, hesitant, or defensive. Instead of letting your fears take over, contrast them with reality. Think of the evidence that contradicts your negative assumptions, such as positive feedback, previous successes, or supportive listeners. Challenge your fears with facts, and remind yourself of the reasons why you are speaking, and why your message matters. Use contrast to calm yourself, not to scare yourself.
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Recognize that the vast majority of the audience already has respect for you for doing something they could never see themselves doing: public speaking. It's one of the top fears that people have. So, by virtue of you being up there presenting, you are already a rock star in their eyes! Focus on the "WHY" behind your message. You know that you are sharing something that is going to benefit people and make an impact. If you stumble over words or lose your place, don't apologize, just smile and keep going. Will the audience notice? Perhaps. But so what? They will have more empathy and respect for you when they see you forge ahead with grace and poise. Your message will likely be received with your authenticity. You got this!
Another common source of low self-confidence is feeling overwhelmed by the choices, challenges, or risks involved in speaking. You may wonder if you should use a certain style, strategy, or tool, or if you should address a certain topic, question, or objection. These doubts can make you confused, indecisive, or insecure. Instead of being paralyzed by the options, contrast them with the consequences. Think of the pros and cons of each alternative, and how they align with your purpose, goals, and audience. Choose the option that best serves your speech, and commit to it. Use contrast to clarify yourself, not to complicate yourself.
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Focus on the message, not the tools. I have seen world-class speakers masterfully deliver an hour keynote with ZERO slides. I have also seen other pros use the most incredible audio-visual display that leaves the audiences in awe. You have to figure out the most effective way to convey YOUR message. The tools you use should complement the message, not BE the focus of the message. If you're not as comfortable putting slides together, bring someone in who might be able to provide assistance. I know many professionals speakers who do just that. Be authentically you. Your message will be well received if the audience senses you are genuine.
Another common source of low self-confidence is being unsure of the value, relevance, or impact of your speech. You may wonder if your audience will care, listen, or act on your message, or if you will achieve your desired outcome. These questions can make you uncertain, apologetic, or passive. Instead of being vague about the value, contrast your features with benefits. Think of how your speech can solve a problem, satisfy a need, or create an opportunity for your audience. Show them what's in it for them, and how they can benefit from your message. Use contrast to persuade yourself, and your audience.
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I go into my speeches knowing that my message IS going to have an impact on peoples' lives. I know that there are people in the audience who will feel like the message is catered just to them. I also recognize that there will be some in the audience who, for any number of their personal reasons, may not be as moved. Keep your focus on knowing that there WILL be people positively impacted and your message is going to make a difference in their lives. You have a message to share. Deliver your message with the expectation that there will be people approaching you after to thank you. Picture how good that feeling is going to be and use that to motivate you.
Another common source of low self-confidence is being aware of your weaknesses, limitations, or mistakes as a speaker. You may worry about your voice, body language, or delivery, or about your content, structure, or evidence. These concerns can make you self-conscious, distracted, or embarrassed. Instead of being fixated on your weaknesses, contrast them with your strengths. Think of what you do well, what you are passionate about, or what makes you unique as a speaker. Highlight your strengths, and work on your weaknesses. Use contrast to enhance yourself, not to diminish yourself.
Another common source of low self-confidence is facing the challenges, obstacles, or uncertainties that come with speaking. You may encounter technical issues, unexpected questions, or difficult situations. These events can make you frustrated, nervous, or discouraged. Instead of being intimidated by the challenges, contrast them with the opportunities. Think of how you can overcome, adapt, or learn from them, and how they can help you grow, improve, or innovate as a speaker. Embrace the challenges, and seize the opportunities. Use contrast to inspire yourself, not to deter yourself.
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What I have learned from not only public speaking but also doing stand-up comedy, is that comedians already have an arsenal of pre-written and rehearsed comebacks and responses to hecklers. They're not thinking of those responses on the fly, they have planned for what they would say IF an audience member heckles. Likewise, in speaking, be prepared for what you would do IF the mic doesn't work, the AV doesn't work, your computer freezes up, the electricity goes out, there is a fire alarm, someone has a medical emergency, there's an altercation between audience members, etc. (I've encountered each these things while speaking - thankfully not at the same time!). Coming up with a plan helps you through those events and instills confidence.
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Using contrast to boost self-confidence when speaking involves comparing past experiences and current improvements. First, reflect on times when you felt less confident and recall how you've grown. Then, identify your strengths, knowledge, and accomplishments. Contrasting past doubts with present abilities can inspire self-assurance. Additionally, envision the positive impact of confident communication, such as conveying ideas effectively or impressing others. This visualization can reinforce your self-esteem. Finally, practice self-compassion and remind yourself that everyone has moments of insecurity. Embracing contrast allows you to appreciate personal growth and recognize that you have what it takes to speak confidently.
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It's helpful to be very specific in your contrasts, not generalities. Contrast what is what is real, not rhetorically. If there are real contrast that are effective. They will stand out and be part of your everyday language and not only what you do for a presentation.
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