You’re a software engineer with a supervisor who’s also a technical team member. How do you manage conflicts?
As a software engineer, you may encounter conflicts with your supervisor, who is also a technical team member. This can be challenging, as you need to balance your professional relationship, your technical opinions, and your personal feelings. How do you manage these conflicts effectively and constructively? Here are some tips to help you.
The first step is to understand the roles and responsibilities of your supervisor and yourself. Your supervisor may have a dual role as a technical leader and a manager, which means they have to make decisions that affect the team, the project, and the organization. You, as a software engineer, have to follow the technical direction, deliver quality code, and contribute to the team's goals. Recognize that your supervisor may have more information, experience, and authority than you, but also respect your own expertise, creativity, and perspective.
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Need to understand his perspective as he is sitting at higher up and he is able to see bigger picture than me from the point of view of the company however I would like to express my thoughts on my technical work and take his opinion to meet Organisation goals in alignment with his managerial and technical outlooks
The second step is to communicate clearly and respectfully with your supervisor. Conflicts often arise from misunderstandings, assumptions, or unmet expectations. To avoid or resolve these issues, you should communicate your ideas, questions, feedback, and concerns in a timely, honest, and constructive manner. Use appropriate channels, such as email, chat, or video call, depending on the urgency and complexity of the situation. Listen actively to your supervisor's point of view, acknowledge their feedback, and clarify any doubts or disagreements.
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One thing which is very important in the relationship between a manager and team member is that the communication must be open, transparent and candid so that either side knows the fact, expectation, and hurdles if any. Many times due to gap in communication and transparency, trust deficit starts building which causes major challenges later on. We must nit allow communication gap in the team in either side.
The third step is to focus on the problem, not the person. Conflicts can become personal and emotional, especially if you have a close or long-term relationship with your supervisor. However, this can damage your trust, cooperation, and productivity. To prevent or overcome this, you should focus on the technical or business problem that needs to be solved, rather than the personal or interpersonal issues that may arise. Use objective facts, data, and evidence to support your arguments, rather than subjective opinions, feelings, or preferences. Seek common ground, shared goals, and mutual benefits, rather than competing interests, ego, or pride.
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When there is an issue and there are problems in front of us or projects getting delayed, we try to find out scapegoats and blame them for the problem rather than focusing on the facts and ground realities to be resolved. This approach kills team spirit, trust and team work. Whenever there are challenges, failures and problems, we must focus more deeply in the factors causing problems not the people around us because problems happen, mistakes occur but team members will resolve them eventually and learn not to repeat in future. That is how learning curve works and develops people.
The fourth step is to seek solutions, not blame. Conflicts can lead to finger-pointing, accusations, or defensiveness, which can escalate the tension and hinder the progress. Instead of blaming your supervisor or yourself for the problem, you should seek solutions that can address the root cause, improve the situation, and satisfy both parties. Brainstorm ideas, propose alternatives, evaluate pros and cons, and negotiate trade-offs. Be open-minded, flexible, and willing to compromise. Accept responsibility for your actions, apologize for your mistakes, and appreciate your supervisor's efforts.
The fifth step is to learn from the experience, not repeat it. Conflicts can be opportunities for learning, growth, and improvement, if you handle them positively and professionally. After resolving a conflict with your supervisor, you should reflect on what you learned, what you did well, and what you can do better. Identify the lessons, insights, and best practices that can help you prevent or manage future conflicts. Share your feedback, suggestions, and gratitude with your supervisor. Celebrate your achievements, strengthen your relationship, and move on.
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